Report on New Recruits

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Hope this letter finds you well – or at least still alive.
We were approached by eleven potential recruits. Of these, three were found lacking, four were given simple tasks to demonstrate their commitment to the cause, and a further three were killed due to suspicions regarding their motivations.
The last case, concerning one Klaus (\the Brave", as he insisted) was a bit unusual – I shall describe it in detail, as we all need a good laugh every once in a while.